your computer has lungs and it loves when you smoke directly into it
your computer wants to make out with you mid rip
L + horatio + there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy
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one of my students downloaded an image for a project today and named it, before my eyes, “PNG.jpg”
assistant: and don’t forget sir that you have a meeting this afternoon with the stakeholders
dracula:
they’re announcing who’s gonna be the next markiplier tomorrow
do any beautiful women want to engage in fun actjvites such as “trespassing” with me
guy who gets so mad about losing a video game that instead of punching his wall he goes and gets his electric hole saw and it’s not battery powered so has to run an extension cord and it’s a whole thing
worlds most stoic monk is seen allowing the shadow of a smile to play across his stern lips as he reads the ‘jokes’ section of a highlights kids magazine
the bookshelf has a present for you
please help me I’m trapped in a haiku factory it’s so dark in here
I’m scheduled to be executed by tiring squad tomorrow. big group of socially outgoing guys with loud voices are gonna trap me in conversations and make me do tricks until I wear myself out, and then I will go to bed and sleep so soundly that I never wake up again